A wish

Well, after some time writing in Portuguese, it is now time to take a new step. From now on i'll be writing both Portuguese and English. Accept please my excuses in following mistakes, but i only had 4 years of english at school which helped me as much as my neighbor helps me when I moan the lawn. So I must say that I am a self taught person in the English language. Games and books did all the hard work, then the Internet, college and now friends do the rest.

It has been a quite rewarding experience, and I am willing to learn a new language in a year or two. I matriculated myself in a school some time ago, but timetables from school where not compatible, so I had to quit. Maybe, with Erasmus in another country that will be possible, it is only one year away, let’s see what the future reserves to us. As Queens of the Stone Age said: “Nobody knows”.

Well, but I was here to talk about wishes. At the age of 19, two months away from 20, wishes multiply in my head. I want a new guitar, a new car, I want to travel, I want to play,…well, I want to do everything. But I must realize as well that I am only 20. I am just at one third of my total life (I intend to live only 60 years), and I made almost everything already. The truth is, we can’t expect to do everything in 20, 25 years at least everything we wish. We need to calm down, as pre-adults, as teenagers, whatever you may call a person in my age. Nowadays everyone has a hurry to live, and they commit hard mistakes, that they will never forget.

Think with me. If you had already make everything you wish, what will you do in the next fifty years? You may say: “ I may die tomorrow “, ok, I say; “ Hum, hum and you may live one hundred years more”.

What I see is a reflection of older people, the generation before us. They did everything while in the adolescence. Sex, drugs, alcohol, travel, cars, books, movies,….everything. Now they are just living the life, with only a career to pursuit in their work.

Above all, I want to love, not only a woman, but books and movies, houses and tastes, and I think to myself that it is too early. I need to be older to get all the juice of those things. I need experience. And everyone I know is committing the error of not waiting and being impulsive (my opinion).

Carpe Diem. No, no, no! I refuse to do that. I want to taste everything with calm and appreciate the beautiful moments of my life. I want to have the best sex at 25, then at 30, then at 35, then at 40….I don’t want to have the best sex now, and then have just bold, boring sex for the rest of my life.

I am not convinced that I am expressing myself correctly for you, readers, to understand what I mean and in English my conviction is even less.

What I mean, and in a way of conclusion, is that we must have calm. If we see everyone around us developing relationships, money, great cars and great girlfriends quickly we must not forget that we have only 20 years and that our time will come too.

But in a way of warning you to the danger of thinking this way, you must not let your arms down and give up the fight of having what you wish. Quite the other way, you must fight, and fight hard, because life is a promise and you must fulfill it. The main thing is to don’t get frustrated when things don’t run so well as you wish.